"Remember that a person's name to that person is the sweetest and most important sound in any language" - Dale Carnegie
Imagine this.
You meet someone briefly at a party - you shake hands, quickly exchange pleasantries and move on with your evening.
Imagine seeing that same person two months later at a restaurant - they call you by your name, and tell you it was nice meeting you at that party last month. What would you think?
You may feel really good that the person remembered who you were. You may be impressed or surprised. You may even feel a little bad that you didn't remember their name. Despite how you feel, this person has displayed that they cared enough to remember who you were, and you're now engaged in the interaction.
When we sense that people care - a rapport starts taking place - and that's when most conversations of substance start happening.
In a sales setting, remembering and recalling a person's name can be a powerful tool to establishing the rapport and trust necessary to open those important conversations.
Follow the steps below for a breakdown on how to remember a person's name.
Step 1: Change your attitude.
Part of the reason why a person doesn't remember someone's name is because they simply think they can’t. A lot of people have an “I’m not good with name’s, I’m better with faces”, or some variation of that, attitude. Simply saying, “I’m going to remember more people’s name’s” is a much better attitude, because you’re setting yourself up for success.
Step 1a: Recognize that it takes effort.
Ask yourself, have I ever really tried to remember a name? Like put any effort into it? Maybe, maybe not. Guess what? Once you understand that all you need to do is try, just a bit, you’ll be way more successful.
Step 2: Have a WHY.
Like anything else we do, there’s a motive behind our actions. Why should we put effort into something if there’s no benefit to us or anyone else? True. So, understand why remembering a person's name is important to you. Pick a reason. Keep it simple. My personal why is because I know it’s something that other people genuinely appreciate.
A few other examples may be -- because you want to make a good impression on a client, because you don't want to look stupid in a meeting, because you want to prove to yourself you can, because you want to put a smile on someone's face, because you want to keep more people engaged, because you want to ask someone for a favour, etc.
Step 3: Be Present.
This is everything. Make a conscious effort to completely clear your head and get into the moment. Listen to the person. Look at the person. When they say their name, take it in immediately.
A side note. Thoughts of tonight’s dinner, the intimidating dude in the corner, or an episode of The Bachelor Canada should not be in your head. Remembering a person’s name is the most important thing in your world right then and there.
Step 4: Say their name back to them.
For example – they say, hey I’m Jimmy – you say, nice to meet you, Jimmy. Or you can respond –Jimmy... good to meet you, thanks for coming out. It’s up to you how to respond, just make sure to incorporate their name in your response.
If you were distracted or unsure that you heard them correctly – you can ask – it was Jimmy, right?
If the person has a name you’ve never heard of, or was difficult to understand, ask them if they mind repeating it. If you still can’t make out the name, ask them to kindly spell it out. J-I-M-M-Y. Then repeat their name back to them. There’s no shame in doing this, because you’re showing that remembering their name is important to you.
Step 5: Repeat their name in your head.
Once the introduction is over, look at them, take in their face (or something that they’re wearing), and repeat their name in your head two or three times. Jimmy. That’s Jimmy. Cool, got it. Remember, you are still present during this part.
I'm telling you, remembering a person's name is a game changer. The better we communicate, the more value we bring to people's lives.
